self-growth

I am sitting across from my father in our kitchen table, which was designed for 4 but where usually a large crowd of 5-6 gathered for meals on recent weekends.   We try to replace the loneliness inside with the number of people in our presence.

Now we are alone for our weekday dinner.  We both feel lonely while we chew our food, which I cooked and I am sure it doesn’t taste that good to him.  I don’t and can’t cook like my mom.  He is missing her, missing his old self; I am missing my mom, my energetic even if anxious dad, my child who is thousands of miles away and even my partner in my troubled marriage.

Allow myself to feel fullyRead More »